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Conspiracy - The Super-Secret Goon Squad

I’m not a conspiracy buff, although I do like conspiracy themed movies and books, but yesterday I got into a conspiracy detecting mode while driving to Stockholm. On the motorway travelling south came the Super-Secret Goon Squad [SSGS]. I have no better name for them for I know not what they where. I had never heard of or encountered anything like this before.

First I met a totally black minibus. “Well, big deal” you might think and rightly so. What made this a big deal was that even the windows where black. In Sweden as far as I know you are permitted to put dark sunscreens and such on your rear windows but not on the front window nor on the side windows up front of the car. This minibus had black windows all around. What more they had several flashing blue lights placed in such a way that they probably wouldn’t be detected when not lit. The final straw was the fact that it drove at high speed but didn’t use any sirens. What the hell was it?

As I was pondering that question car number two came swooshing by approximately 10-15 minutes after the minibus. This time it was an all black Audi A4 Avant with the same black windows and flashing blue lights. Still driving fast without a siren. I started looking around me for the black helicopters but didn’t see any. I guess they had some silent flight mode and had already flow by. I wondered where they were going.

Today I looked in the paper trying to figure out what happened yesterday to bring out this super secret elit policeforce or whatever they were but with out any luck. There had been a bankrobbery and someone had fired a pistol in a nearby village but none of the pictures in the newspapers showed my black cars. There were always regular policecars in the pictures. I guess the SSGS confiscated all pictures with the SSGS showing in them? Or perhaps they replaced the journalists with their own people? Or maybe they brainwashed them to forget the whole thing. Or maybe …

Well, enough of the conspiracy paranoia I just want to know what the hell these car were. Which government branch do they belong to and what is their function? Anyone?

Posted by Edward on Tuesday, May 29th, 2007 at 19:39:57.

6 Responses to “Conspiracy - The Super-Secret Goon Squad”

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Sweden

http://www.xkcd.com/c258.html is all I have to say on the matter. ;)

Posted by Caroline on May 30th, 2007

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Sweden

Great cartoon Caroline. As it is I know everything there is to know about bug reports. Since about 9 a’clock this morning I’m swamped with them. Why me?

On an other note the SSGS are probably NI (formerly ONI). And their reason for heading south was most likely the bank robbery in Kisa which occured eight years, on the day, after another bank robbery at the same bank. A bank robbery that led to one of Sweden’s most well known and brutal cop killings in Malexander. It would appear that the Police feared that there might be a correlation between past and present events.

Posted by Edward on May 30th, 2007

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Sweden

haha, love the comic Carro ;)
oooh, why did they have to change their name? ONI is so much cooler. “Oni” a sort of deamon or ogre in japanese mythology. “Ni” is just something excessively silly knights living in forrest yell at innocent bypassers. ;)

btw. I see you still have the old link to my blog on your blogroll, I too have got my own domain now. ;)

Posted by Martin on May 31st, 2007

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United States

In America, we’d call them NSA, which stands for National Security Agency but if you ask about their existence, the letters stand for “No Such Agency”… :wink:

Posted by Kurt Hans Hierta on May 31st, 2007

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Sweden

Martin you know that japanese fixation can be too much some times but don’t worry I’m sure there is help to be found. ;-)

Btw the knights are no longer known by that name instead they call themselves “The Knights that say Ecky-ecky-ecky-ecky-Pf’tang, Zzoo-Boing, gdgdbaaoizen”. How could you possibly have missed that small name change? :-D

But I do agree that the acronym ONI was much better. It was so much simpler to say than NI.

And I have rerouted my link to your new domain. I’ll use it to follow your adventures in Japan.

Posted by Edward on May 31st, 2007

Gravatar
Sweden

hejdig.

Why have black cars without sirens for a bank robbery? Wouldn’t ordinary cars be better? With sounding sirens.

It isn’t like the police having to sneak up on bank robbers.

I heard on the radio that in the 80s there was some discussion in the police force about changing to blue and red roof lights. Like they have in police movies in the USA. And woiowoiow-ing sound too. Today we are glad the swedish police didn’t change to that. And sneakers without socks, white jacket and T-shirt.

/OF

Posted by LosManos on September 13th, 2007

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